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Parents who adopt have to make a difficult decision when telling their children that they are adopted. There’s always a debate about what the appropriate age is for such news.

To be clear, it should never be a debate of whether or not to tell a child they’re adopted. Parents should always strive to do right by their children, including finding the appropriate time and way to tell them of their adoption

Important Factors

Naturally, there are a few factors that may dictate when this conversation must happen. For example, the type of adoption arrangement may require the child to understand what is happening at a young age. Or they could be old enough to already be aware of the situation around them – and how it is changing.

Honesty Is Key

Some parents may be tempted to sweep the truth under the rug, but this will undoubtedly cause more harm than good. Children have a knack for spotting when something is different and very well may find out on their own or through another source. It is harder to control how the information comes out when this happens and could very well upset the child.

Furthermore, children (and adults) have a right to understand their genetics. If they never know they’re adopted, they will inevitably begin unintentionally providing inaccurate information to their doctors.

Knowing When To Talk

Popular media would have people believe that most adopted children don’t find out until they are teens. While this may be the case sometimes, more often than not, experts recommend telling children when they’re significantly younger.

According to experts, openly discussing your child’s adoption from a young age has the best results. Children who grow up knowing they’re adopted are more likely to positively view the process and even feel proud of their situation and family.

Conversation Advice

There are many different ways to go about telling a child they’re adopted. However, experts such as Maryanne Ludwig and Michael Thompson believe that the conversation should be simple.

More importantly, this is a conversation that parents should be willing to have regularly. There are many reasons for this, including satisfying curiosity, reinforcing positive thinking, and reminding their child that they are wanted and loved.